Happy Birthday Alexander

Today you are six.  You are ready to read, ready to entertain.  I love the way you get so excited by something so that you're laughing so hard that no one can understand you.  I appreciate the way you are so content to entertain yourself.  You spend hours with your Lego, Thomas, a puzzle or a craft project.  And you have a sensitive side.  When you're sad, Mama can comfort you.  I pray that continues.  As you start out in this new year of discovery and learning, I wish it to be full of joy and challenges overcome.  And in all your triumphs I pray that you see the glory of God in them and through them.

This Weekend

This weekend is full of bustle.  After a week of snow covering the ground (it's May for pity's sake!!), the lawn and trees are becoming lush and green.  My wee little plants lived through it, in fact seemed to have thrived.  We will plant 75 strawberries.  We will bake a cake with Mom's artistic rendition of a Star Wars character.  Mom will get her hair cut.  We will have a weiner roast.  And grandparents will visit and spoil all children but in a special way, the Giraffe.  Happy pre-birthday weekend.

Don't buy the hype!

We woke up to a foot and a half of snow this morning.  It's May long weekend and we were going to plant our garden.  Global warming my foot.

The Fields Are Calling

Spring is here.  Well, at least according to the calendar.  We woke up to snow this morning, just a skiff, but snow it was.  One sign of spring is that soccer has started.  We have two boys playing this year.  And they are from opposite ends of the athletic spectrum.  One who sobs if soccer is cancelled and another who shrugs and rejoices in being able to sit in the house a bit longer.  At the end of the month we'll add swimming to the mix and see how that turns out.

Ambassadors for Life

I feel a certain pressure when out in public with our children. Whether rational or not, it's there. I need the children to be clean, polite and well behaved. These are of course what every parent - I imagine- desires for their family, but I think that as a large family (I didn't know we were a large family until someone told me we were) who homeschools, it's important that people not perceive me as a tired hag of a mother, so put upon by ill behaved children. It's probably vanity on my part, but I don't want people to think that children are this huge awful burden. In a world where people only see the inconvenience , because let's face it, children are inconvenient to me being the centre of the universe, I wish for people to see the joy and the love that accompanies more children. How much they love each other, how much they look forward to the new baby. How they are making me and my husband better people, with more love to give. It's odd that quite often people react negatively to the idea that we're having our 6th baby. Does this stem from the "me" generation, or is it something deeper, more sinister?
I try not to imagine the day when there are no more babies in our house, because it makes me sad. This is a far cry from the young 18 year old me who wanted no children ever. The thought of being able to co-create with God a new soul is so thrilling and beautiful.
I have been asked if they're all mine, if I know what causes this (my husband's response is a wolfish grin and a hearty "Yes. And we like it."), if they're all from my body, are you done? I must be charitbale in my response because these people just don't understand. But anything I come up with seems so unsatisfactory. I want to soften their hearts to the beauty of new souls, new, fresh thoughts and outlooks. So I try to smile through the punishment of public shopping. So I make sure the children are dressed neatly and that they are polite. Because I am an ambassodor of the Culture of Life. And so are they.

Angry Baby, You're the One (to the tune of Rubber Ducky)

Mark is turning into a baby who knows his own mind. He knows what he wants and communicates very effectively to get it. He is so cheerful most of the time, but if he wants something and you're denying him, then his temper kicks in. I have never seen such a little baby become so furious. He scrunches up his little face, and throws his body back. He screams and shakes his head. It is truly impressive, and it works. Who is going to ignore that? And this at 8 months. Look out world... By the way, weighs in at 18.45lbs.

Small Successes

1. Cleaned out my kitchen cupboards (well most of them). 
2. For each appointment this week we have been on time if not early, despite having multiple appointments back to back 30 minutes travel apart. And I kept my cool. 
3. I have purchased a good part of my bedding plants (early for us - it’s still pretty cool in Canada).

Surprises

We have been surprised.  Never before have I ovulated while exclusively breast-feeding.  Apparently I did and more obviously I missed it.  Truly, I wasn't paying that much attention, because I've never had to.  God has blessed this lack of observation with more than I deserve.  I am pregnant(who didn't see that coming?) and have no idea when the babe is due.  The doc suspects I'm 5 months along, but we won't know until my ultrasound on the 15th.  What has this meant?  I was so sick and couldn't figure out why no one else was getting the flu I had.  It means I continued to be more active than I would have if I'd known I was pregnant and feeling sorry for myself.  It means my pregnancy is about half done and I didn't even know.  It's very cool.  God knows what we need.

It does come with anxieties though, and I know God will look after them, but I keep wrestling them from his hands.  Poor Matthew and Mark will have shortened infanthoods.  I'll have 3 under 3.  All survivable, but still...  It's just my lack of control and my desire for it.

The children are so very happy and excited, and truly, so am I.  Each baby leaves one wondering it this is the last one and there's such a sadness in that, a mourning for a state of life that is passing.  But God in his mercy has given us another baby.  Justin glows.  He loves his babies so much.

Where my be

Today found us on the hunt for a suit for First Holy Communion.  It is always an adventure to load up everyone and take them someplace very public.  I always feel like I'm on trial for larger families everywhere.  But that's another post.

We successfully found a great outfit for Patrick.  But poor Matthew.  Everytime he took a shine to something for him we told him no.  The bathing suit that was a size 14 boys, the pink tankini, the pink sunglasses, the fluffy stuffed rabbit, the pink sandals(for Becca): all no.  Then at dinner, due to his recent meal strike, we didn't order him his own meal.  So he's shouting at the waitress, "Me too.  Where my be?" and then at dessert, the same thing.  Sharing wasn't going to cut it.  So onto the last store of the day, a mega store, and once again, "No honey, I don't need to buy you shoes.  You don't need water shoes (because you're not doing swimming lessons with the big kids - not out loud)."  And I just couldn't bear to tell him one more time that he just wasn't getting anything today.  That he has everyone else's hand me downs, that he didn't need anything.  "Yes, my love the sandals that light up are just what you need.  Yes, you can wear them home."  And VERY happily he did.